You only have six months to live

How would you react after hearing those words “You only have 6 months to live”? Well, that was the fate of my mother and she seemed to be handling it well. How would you react after hearing such words?

After receiving her diagnosis, my mom underwent a few weeks of chemotherapy. During those times, my siblings and I did our best to care for her; whether by travelling from Toronto to Grenada, making frequent visits to her house or giving her foot massages; we all strove to serve her to the best of our abilities. Throughout those times, I was privileged to have many heart-to-heart conversations with my mother. During one of our conversations, she mentioned never imagining her children would do the things we were doing for her now, but she was extremely appreciative. I was grateful for the opportunities I had to serve my mother, as they reminded me to put others before myself and serve with Christ-like love and humility. My mother spent her entire life sacrificing for her children, now it was our turn to do the same.

You’re probably wondering who is this woman I’m writing about - well, let me tell you a little about my beloved mother. As a stay-at-home mom growing up, my mother ensured we all had a hot meal whenever we got home from work or school. She was hard on discipline, and trust me, we frequently tasted from her wrath. My mother was an entrepreneur and created various things to sell in order to help provide for her family. Mommy loved life. She loved fashion. She had a passion for the less fortunate and was very ambitious. She didn’t allow anything to stand in her way, even her age! In her early 50’s, she sought to get her driver’s licence, and from that point onward she was constantly on the move. It was extremely difficult seeing my mother sick, weak, dependant and unable to do the things she loved since I was accustomed to seeing her strong and healthy all my life. Throughout her sickness, I was reminded of the reality that life is fleeting and we often take things for granted. We think we’ll always wake up the next morning, or we’ll always be able to take a shower or use the bathroom on our own, but seeing my mom endure these challenges allowed me to put things into perspective. I should be mindful how I treat people with my words, attitude and actions; I should love unconditionally and be quick to forgive, even if it’s not reciprocated, and most importantly, I should live each day as if it were my last. How different we would live if we knew it was our final day on this earth.

During my mother’s final months, I strove to ensure all was well with her mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically. It wasn’t about what she had or had not accomplished, but rather, if the Lord chose to take her through death, she was ready. I encouraged her to forgive those who hurt her, and to seek out and ask for forgiveness from those she hurt. There is such a freedom in humbly asking for forgiveness, even while on one’s deathbed. Why wouldn’t we want to spend our final moments in total freedom? Ironically, while writing this post, I received a video clip by Sid Roth entitled, “Praying for healing, while planning a funeral”, in which a wife was speaking to her terminally ill husband about forgiveness. There’s something powerful about forgiving someone during a terminal illness, because it is widely believed that some terminal illnesses are a result of unforgiveness, bitterness or resentment. We do more harm than good to ourselves when we choose not to forgive.

My grandmother passed away seven months before my mom did and three days before she died, I was led to call and pray for her, which I willingly did. While in excruciating pain, she said something to me I’ll never forget, “I’m lying here thinking about who I’ve hurt.” This was evidence of my grandmother’s conversion, since just a week prior she gave her heart to the Lord. It was amazing how God was transforming her heart in the midst of her illness and in her few moments as a new disciple, she was bearing fruit. I desired to see my mother experience the same freedom my grandmother did before she died.

In June, while terminally ill my mother along with my dad and sister went to Grenada. It was something she was determined to do, and trust me, no one could stop her decision. Since,my family and I would be travelling the following month to Grenada, she was waiting on my husband to take her to the beach, but sadly she never got her wish. While we were there, she spent the entire week in the hospital. She was extremely weak, unable to feed herself and in constant discomfort. I can tell you one thing, my mom wanted to live. On three occasions she asked me ‘if Jesus would give her a miracle’; a question I didn’t know how to answer. It’s now been 45 days since my mom left this earth, a reality I still find hard to believe. I grieve in knowing she will never attend any of her grandchildren’s wedding or witness the miracles she prayed for concerning her family. So many things will happen without her presence, but I am comforted in knowing that from her death, good will come out of it.

I’m grateful my mother had time to repair her relationship with God and loved ones.

My question is, will you? We do not know our final hour, nor should we wait for that time to make things right with God and others. How is your relationship with Christ, your brothers and sisters, your co-workers, and neighbours? Don’t allow pride, money, or unforgiveness keep you away from repenting and coming to know the One who made you for himself. God is a merciful God who wants us to enjoy the place He went to prepare for us - a place where I believe my mother and grandmother are now. How about you?