Stop Being A Hypocrite

A few mornings ago, I was awakened by an odd dream which left me perplexed, yet intrigued. I dreamt that myself, along with a pastor’s daughter were running from a group of people. We crossed the street and headed to what seemed like a forest, and once we got there, a group of people directed us where to go. One of the guys - a Minister from the church - told us to climb the ladder, and refrain from looking down. As I glanced upward, I couldn’t see where the ladder ended, since it was far beyond the clouds. I just kept climbing. Soon after reaching the top, we realised the people who chased us were the girl’s parents. The mother started making fun of me, and at first, I felt embarrassed and started to cry, but then I came out from where I was hiding and decided to confront her. I told her she was a fake and wasn’t practising what she preached. That she was hurting people and no one had the guts to stand up to her. That she condemned her congregation for their wrongdoing, but justified her actions when doing the same thing.

I then showed her where her daughter was hiding and said, “your daughter is afraid of you. She’s afraid to say your actions are wrong, so instead she remains silent just to please you. You’re a bully. A controller. A manipulator. Your followers are afraid of you, and as a result, they remain silent.” After I finished giving her a piece of my mind, she walked away, with her entourage following behind. I stood there, stunned. I couldn't believe I just confronted this powerful woman regarding her behaviour! Shortly after, I heard someone shout, “look!” As I glanced up, there was a host of fiery angels descending towards Earth. They passed directly overhead, and we stood there in awe, witnessing what was unfolding right before our eyes. They began resting on many buildings and city structures, but refused to rest upon her father’s church. After realising their refusal, she decided to return to her father in order to assist. I encouraged her to help, and also stand up to her mother’s hypocrisy.

Then, I awoke. I tried making sense of this perplexing dream. During the course of the morning, I recalled a question someone asked during our bible study on Titus, “who will confront preachers who aren’t preaching sound doctrine?” to which our pastor responded, “you will. We all will.” As followers of Christ, we ought to correct one another when we walk contrary to God’s word. Still meditating on the dream later that day, I recalled an incident that happened while working part-time for a company. Our HR manager constantly emphasised the importance of providing exceptional customer service, since that was the main focus. We went through rigorous training to ensure we meticulously followed all the steps, from the beginning of a transaction until the very end. The company even had undercover shoppers to ensure we followed the customer service guidelines! One day when a customer needed help, and just as I headed over to assist, the HR Manager stepped in. As I stood there observing, I realised he failed to do all the steps he trained us to follow, and noted his poor execution of the company’s main focus - customer service. As the customer walked away, I decided to respectfully confront him, and mentioned his failure to follow the same training we underwent. He looked at me with a sheepish smile and walked away. I wondered then, and still wonder now, why some authority figures drill their subordinates and demand they do certain things when they fail to adhere to the same rules? Why is it the constant practice of “do what I say, and not what I do”?

Later on, I recalled another instance when my daughters were very young, and constantly fought with each other. Their inability to cooperate resulted in my constant pleas to “get along” and “be nice,” but meanwhile, they witnessed my husband and I going at each other. Seemed like we were the reason for their demise. Seemed like I was the reason for their horrible conflict resolution skills. I felt like such a hypocrite. How could I expect them to do something contrary to what they observed? How could I expect what I wasn’t demonstrating? It’s vital for us as parents, leaders, ministers or anyone in a position of authority to be men and women of integrity - to practise what we preach, and demonstrate what we desire. I quickly learned I had to be aware of my behaviour in every context, and teach my children through modelling. How can they learn if they first do not see?

Fast forwarding a few years later, there was a time I crossed paths with a couple I knew while leaving the chiropractor’s office. I couldn’t remember the husband’s name, but after exchanging a few words, I remembered he was a pastor. While sitting in the office with my son the following week, I saw them coming in and thought his wife’s choice of clothing was slightly questionable. Maybe she’s no longer walking with the Lord, I thought. After sharing the predicament with my husband, I resolved to speak with her the next time we crossed paths. I wanted to correct her in love, because as followers of Christ, we ought to look out for one another, and spur each other onto good deeds. I hoped to introduce myself, find out how she was doing, and eventually develop a relationship before choosing to confront her - but the whole ordeal was frightening. I pondered upon the ways I presented myself to the world, and started second guessing whether my actions were a reflection of the truth I preached. Do my actions cause others to question my faith in Christ? My only hope was that others would see that my practice matched my proclamation - I didn’t want to be viewed as a hypocrite.

Friends, I encourage us to be the mirror which reflects the positive values we desire to instil in our children. Let’s not confuse them by saying one thing, but doing the contrary. Let’s make sure we take the log out of our eyes, before discipling them for the speck in theirs. It’s time to lead by example. Employers, you are the trend setters within your company. The best teacher is demonstration. Let your employees witness you emulate the very skills you desire. Ministers and preachers of the Gospel, I pray you can say to the world and to your congregations, “follow me, as I follow Christ.” Treat your followers with respect. Don’t manipulate or belittle them. See people the way Christ sees them, and be a good shepherd by your example of love. Like the Apostle Paul said to Titus, “that [our] opponent will be put to shame, having nothing bad to say about us.” Titus 2:8